Reason #1 for being Drunk In Penn

In my regular non website running occupation I am a bartender in the lovely big apple. On the rare night that I get off from work I tend to frequent other watering holes in the city. Last night my part time web blogging partner Corrado and his cousin from across the pond went down to the meat packing district to check out some place called Brass Monkey. Since we were passing Hogs and Heifers on the way we decided to stop in for at least one drink to show him the joint. That one drink turned into the entire night and I must say it was a much better time the I last remembered the place about 8 years ago. The girls on the megaphone and spitting fire was a highlight and Alexis the bartender kept me entertained while she dug into this one jerkoff for his hideous sweater. They are the reason I was Drunk In Penn. We never made it to that other bar but my pocket is empty and I have the hangover to prove that I had a great time. TIP YOUR BARTENDERS! Good job girls!

Drunks 63-67

Drunks 63-67
10/18/08
2:30-3:19am ish
My only complaint about the iPhone so far is that it doesn't save the time/date of the photos. Since I myself was Drunk In Penn last night I couldnt tell ya the exact times these were taken. I took the 3:19 train back to the hood so these were taken anywhere between 2:30ish and a minute before I jumped on the choo choo.
Why wait till you get home to cuddle? Start the pre-game in Penn!



At least he knew what time the train was supposed to leave. By the looks of it he missed it. You think that thigh pocket ever comes in handy?

Drunk #62!

Drunk #62
10/11/08
5:00am ish
In this photo he looks like any other shmoe sleeping on the ever so spotless Penn floor. But when trains start leaving and this guy is still motionless I guess the fuzz starts to wonder if he even has a pulse. "So what do you wanna do with this one?".... "idk, who won the Socks game?"

"Can I help you?!" ..... "nope".

Sure glad I stuck around because I actually got to witness what I guess is protocol for this kind of situation. They rolled over this low budget wheelchair and pushed the dude a little until he showed signs of life. They got him to his feet, wrapped him in a sheet and tied a clear garbage bag around his neck... I guess to catch any more chunks if the moment strikes. I think at this point he had already let it all out on the floor.



You know those moments when you come to your senses while drunk? Kind of like stepping out of a day dream to realize you passed out on the couch at the halloween kegger? IMAGINE being this guy and waking up strapped down to a chair while they roll you out of Penn? I wouldn't want to explain this to my wife or parents. I assume they bring you somewhere and call a contact to come scoop you up.... or just let you sleep it off. Either way you prob get arrested for extreme drunk in public.

#59-#61

Drunk #59
4:49am
10/11/08
Levis super dooper skinny jeans, Check. Button up sweater, Check. Brand spankin' new kicks, Check. Logo T shirt, Check. Looks like this dude is pooped from his shopping spree at Urban Outfitters.

Drunk #60 and #61
4:38am
10/11/08
"Please sit, remove your caps and bow your heads for a moment of silence..... We have been through rough times these past few weeks.... and we now have a clean up on pillar 289B. At least you saved a bunch of money by not taking a cab home. Thank You."


Puke. Nothing a little kitty litter wont fix. Let it soak up for a minute and sweep it up... 100% sanitary and ready for the next shmuck to lay down on.

Drunk #58
10/11/08
4:40am

What are you doing right now?.... Insert females name here is updating my facebook status while my drunk ass boyfriend is passed out in penn station.

It's barefoot friday!

Drunks #55-57
10/11/08
5:10am




Haven't I seen that tat somewhere before? Oh shit! How original!... you got the same exact Nicole Richie tattoo on your foot! Odds are you dont pray and Nicole isnt even that cool. Next time you should copycat the bumfights guys and get a forehead tattoo.

Thong tha tha Thong Thong!

Livin la vida loca... thighs like what what.. baby move ya butt butt.... all night long, let me see that THONNNNGGGG!!!That Thong tha tha Thong Thong!!!





Pretty sure this isnt standard behavior after you find a thong on the train. These girls found the thong, picked it up... and posed with it for photos. Alcohol is a hell of a drug haha. Taken early this morning on the 5:19am from Penn on the Port Washington line.

Broke the #50 mark!

Ment to post these a few days ago but shit happens. This is part #2 of "Little Ones" pics she took last saturday night in good ol' Penn. It looks like they were all taken in the hot spot area. Feast your eyes....


Drunks #45 + #46
9/28/08
4:00am ish
How cute... at least they arent cuddling. Hopefully he set his cell phones volume to 11. At least he is wearing black socks. Nothing is worse then wearing the hard bottoms and showing white socks when your pants get jacked up. Style points brah!


Drunk # 47
9/28/08
4:00am ish
Dude is OUT! Some Penn employee is changing the garbage inches from this drunkies face. If the wiff of a days worth of Penn garbage doesn't wake you nothing will. Maybe he woke up in the middle of the AM commute. I heard on manSWERS that a fart can be used in place of a mouth for CPR. Pork and beans it is!


Drunk #48
9/28/08
4:00am ish
Lil cat nap before a ride home. Pick up! You have a collect call from the germ police... they say "put your damn shoes on before you walk on this gross floor!"


Drunk #49 + #50
9/28/08
4:00am ish
This could have easily broken the #50 marker for drunks on this page but I figure since the main focus of this photo is the 2 dudes on the right we will keep it at that. The bald dude just looks confused and the blurry image doesnt help his case. BUT the best part of this moment caught in drunk time is the 2 corpses we have in each of the top corners. No faces or torsos.... just legs and ass creeping out of the corners. If you put 2 and 2 together you can figure out that the dude on the top left is infact drunk #47 from the post above.


Drunk #51
9/28/08
4:00am ish
No photos, No photos.


Drunks #52-#54
9/28/08
4:00am ish
I dont know what to say. No witty explanation is needed for this one but I'll try. Passed the fuck out youngsters in rough shape back at the station. Do girls really match their undies to the bags they are gonna bring out that night? Thats news to me. Knees are a little roughed up too.... I wont get into that though. Penn is almost like the side of the road for a deer. You ever notice that they make it to the side of the road before they give up the fight? They get slammed into someones windshield then stumble to the side before dying. Drunks kill their livers but wait till they get inside Penn to shut the lights out on the brain.

FRIDAY NIGHT! DRINK UP!

Drunk #44 Bloody Mayhem!!!

09-26-08
01:39 AM

Imagine my shock when i walk into quiet Penn Station on a thursday night, waiting over 2 hours for my 3:19 train, and i walk into this!! This dude (after a quick investigation by your boy Corradddd) apparently tried 'stealing' a few items from the newspaper/beer/magazine stand, with no success. The cop that is standing over him hunched (out of breath) tackled him at that spot, where he procedded to bleed all over the fuckin floor. Amazing. Apparently in takes 6+ cops to take down 1 drunk dude in a business suit. One of the other cops started cleaning his blood off the floor (barehanded) with a couple of pieces of paper that he found on the floor (protocol???)

Life sucks when your doing the solo drunk missions. Be Careful people... the squallies are watching your every move...